Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures · Record: 2-11 · PPG: 87.4 · 13 reg season + 3 playoff weeks

Week 1: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 102.3 – 126.1 The Arian Brotherhood (L) vs Valenzuela

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 102.3 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	20.5
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	13.1
RB	L. Miller	RB	MIA	1.0
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	16.4
WR	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	14.6
TE	E. Dickson	TE	BAL	1.3
R/W/T	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	17.4
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	11.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		7.0
BN	J. Flacco	QB	BAL	18.5
BN	S. Greene	RB	TEN	1.8
BN	D. Moore	WR	LV	10.3
BN	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	5.6
BN	M. Bush	RB	CHI	1.5
BN	C. Ivory	RB	NYJ	1.5

The Arian Brotherhood (Valenzuela) — 126.1 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	M. Stafford	QB	DET	20.0
RB	L. McCoy	RB	PHI	24.9
RB	D. Murray	RB	DAL	12.5
WR	A. Green	WR	CIN	28.2
WR	R. White	WR	ATL	1.9
TE	A. Gates	TE	LAC	4.9
R/W/T	W. Welker	WR	DEN	16.7
K	D. Bailey	K	DAL	12.0
DEF	Patriots	DEF		5.0
BN	B. Green-Ellis	RB	CIN	8.9
BN	L. Moore	WR	NO	2.3
BN	V. Brown	WR	LAC	7.3
BN	T. Austin	WR	LAR	4.0
BN	D. Hopkins	WR	HOU	6.6
BN	Steelers	DEF		4.0
RES	P. Harvin	WR	SEA	0.0

Week 2: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 103.0 – 55.9 Stanley's Cleveland Steamers (W) vs Waxman

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 103.0 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	12.9
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	2.5
RB	L. Miller	RB	MIA	13.5
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	25.3
WR	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	7.6
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	14.4
R/W/T	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	6.8
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	7.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		13.0
BN	J. Flacco	QB	BAL	13.0
BN	S. Greene	RB	TEN	0.0
BN	D. Moore	WR	LV	0.0
BN	M. Bush	RB	CHI	0.0
BN	C. Ivory	RB	NYJ	5.2
BN	D. Akers	K	DET	3.0

Stanley's Cleveland Steamers (Waxman) — 55.9 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	T. Romo	QB	DAL	14.2
RB	C. Spiller	RB	BUF	11.7
RB	S. Jackson	RB	ATL	6.8
WR	L. Fitzgerald	WR	ARI	3.3
WR	K. Thompkins	WR	NE	4.7
TE	J. Cook	TE	LAR	1.0
R/W/T	D. Sproles	RB	NO	6.2
K	P. Dawson	K	SF	3.0
DEF	Browns	DEF		5.0
BN	A. Roberts	WR	ARI	3.6
BN	J. Thomas	TE	DEN	10.7
BN	T. Smith	WR	BAL	8.5
BN	M. Ingram	RB	NO	2.0
BN	J. Rodgers	RB	ATL	4.5
BN	T. Hilton	WR	IND	12.4

Week 3: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 103.0 – 113.7 Two Girls One Kuper (L) vs Baumann

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 103.0 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	31.8
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	0.0
RB	L. Miller	RB	MIA	6.4
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	6.2
WR	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	3.6
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	5.4
R/W/T	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	11.6
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	13.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		25.0
BN	J. Flacco	QB	BAL	6.8
BN	D. Moore	WR	LV	18.4
BN	S. Rice	WR	SEA	19.9
BN	M. Bush	RB	CHI	6.9
BN	C. Ivory	RB	NYJ	0.5
BN	D. Akers	K	DET	9.0

Two Girls One Kuper (Baumann) — 113.7 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	P. Manning	QB	DEN	24.8
RB	S. Ridley	RB	NE	4.3
RB	A. Morris	RB	WAS	13.3
WR	E. Decker	WR	DEN	19.3
WR	M. Colston	WR	NO	7.1
TE	J. Witten	TE	DAL	6.7
R/W/T	B. Pierce	RB	BAL	13.2
K	M. Prater	K	DEN	15.0
DEF	Vikings	DEF		10.0
BN	R. Mendenhall	RB	ARI	4.1
BN	W. McGahee	RB	CLE	0.9
BN	P. Thomas	RB	NO	6.7
BN	M. Williams	WR	TB	6.5
BN	B. Brown	RB	PHI	0.7
BN	K. Stills	WR	NO	0.0

Week 4: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 76.5 – 110.7 Nicaraguan Crabtree Sandwich (L) vs Banys

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 76.5 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	32.7
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	1.7
RB	L. Miller	RB	MIA	12.8
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	3.4
WR	S. Rice	WR	SEA	1.1
TE	D. Clark	TE	BAL	3.4
R/W/T	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	3.4
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	12.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		6.0
BN	J. Flacco	QB	BAL	11.9
BN	D. Moore	WR	LV	6.6
BN	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	0.0
BN	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	11.0
BN	M. Bush	RB	CHI	0.0
BN	C. Ivory	RB	NYJ	0.0

Nicaraguan Crabtree Sandwich (Banys) — 110.7 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	J. Cutler	QB	CHI	17.6
RB	M. Forte	RB	CHI	17.7
RB	T. Richardson	RB	IND	12.6
WR	P. Garcon	WR	WAS	11.9
WR	A. Boldin	WR	SF	15.0
TE	M. Bennett	TE	CHI	9.0
R/W/T	D. McFadden	RB	LV	2.9
K	S. Hauschka	K	SEA	11.0
DEF	49ers	DEF		13.0
BN	J. Finley	TE	GB	0.0
BN	J. Edelman	WR	NE	11.8
BN	C. Newton	QB	CAR	0.0
BN	F. Jackson	RB	BUF	14.7
BN	M. Wallace	WR	MIA	2.4
BN	J. Blackmon	WR	JAX	0.0
RES	M. Crabtree	WR	SF	0.0

Week 5: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 85.0 – 111.9 Bad Dilfer and a Broken Farve (L) vs Freundlich

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 85.0 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	19.3
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	20.2
RB	L. Miller	RB	MIA	1.5
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	19.2
WR	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	3.9
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	7.9
R/W/T	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	6.0
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	6.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		1.0
BN	J. Flacco	QB	BAL	10.1
BN	D. Moore	WR	LV	14.4
BN	S. Rice	WR	SEA	0.8
BN	D. Clark	TE	BAL	0.0
BN	C. Ivory	RB	NYJ	2.7
BN	R. Hillman	RB	DEN	5.9

Bad Dilfer and a Broken Farve (Freundlich) — 111.9 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	P. Rivers	QB	LAC	18.4
RB	M. Jones-Drew	RB	JAX	8.6
RB	D. Wilson	RB	NYG	7.6
WR	H. Nicks	WR	NYG	14.2
WR	C. Shorts	WR	JAX	13.4
TE	V. Davis	TE	SF	14.8
R/W/T	S. Johnson	WR	BUF	1.9
K	M. Crosby	K	GB	18.0
DEF	Rams	DEF		15.0
BN	K. Britt	WR	TEN	0.9
BN	C. Ogbonnaya	RB	CLE	0.7
BN	K. Hunter	RB	SF	2.9
BN	A. Peterson	RB	MIN	0.0
BN	R. Griffin	QB	WAS	0.0
BN	C. Givens	WR	LAR	1.6
RES	A. Brown	RB	NYG	0.0

Week 6: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 82.7 – 98.2 Shane Falco's Sweet Thighs (L) vs Norberg

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 82.7 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	16.5
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	4.9
RB	R. Hillman	RB	DEN	3.6
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	18.4
WR	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	8.8
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	1.9
R/W/T	C. Ivory	RB	NYJ	1.6
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	14.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		13.0
BN	J. Flacco	QB	BAL	20.3
BN	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	0.0
BN	D. Moore	WR	LV	14.2
BN	S. Rice	WR	SEA	1.5
BN	D. Clark	TE	BAL	14.1
BN	L. Miller	RB	MIA	0.0

Shane Falco's Sweet Thighs (Norberg) — 98.2 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	T. Brady	QB	NE	14.4
RB	J. Charles	RB	KC	24.8
RB	B. Jacobs	RB	NYG	23.4
WR	E. Sanders	WR	PIT	13.0
WR	R. Wayne	WR	IND	8.8
TE	T. Eifert	TE	CIN	1.3
R/W/T	M. Ball	RB	DEN	1.5
K	S. Janikowski	K	LV	1.0
DEF	Broncos	DEF		10.0
BN	J. Jones	WR	ATL	0.0
BN	M. Leshoure	RB	DET	0.9
BN	S. Vereen	RB	NE	0.0
BN	B. Roethlisberger	QB	PIT	15.7
BN	H. Miller	TE	PIT	8.4
BN	Z. Sudfeld	TE	NYJ	0.0

Week 7: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 54.2 – 114.6 Denarius Targaryen Moore (L) vs Ballard

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 54.2 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	N. Foles	QB	PHI	5.7
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	7.2
RB	L. Miller	RB	MIA	4.7
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	2.1
WR	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	8.9
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	4.7
R/W/T	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	6.9
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	9.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		5.0
BN	J. Flacco	QB	BAL	14.0
BN	D. Moore	WR	LV	0.0
BN	S. Rice	WR	SEA	11.0
BN	D. Brees	QB	NO	0.0
BN	D. Clark	TE	BAL	6.9
BN	R. Hillman	RB	DEN	0.6

Denarius Targaryen Moore (Ballard) — 114.6 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	A. Luck	QB	IND	30.0
RB	J. Snelling	RB	ATL	1.4
RB	R. Bush	RB	DET	9.4
WR	C. Johnson	WR	DET	27.5
WR	S. Smith	WR	CAR	12.9
TE	J. Fauria	TE	DET	1.5
R/W/T	E. Royal	WR	LAC	12.9
K	R. Gould	K	CHI	11.0
DEF	Chiefs	DEF		8.0
BN	C. Johnson	RB	TEN	17.0
BN	C. Ogbonnaya	RB	CLE	1.5
BN	A. Bradshaw	RB	IND	0.0
BN	O. Daniels	TE	HOU	0.0
BN	M. Vick	QB	PHI	0.0
BN	J. Jones	WR	GB	0.0

Week 8: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 71.0 – 103.4 Cecil Your Shorts III (L) vs Foote

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 71.0 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	33.2
RB	L. Miller	RB	MIA	11.2
RB	R. Hillman	RB	DEN	0.0
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	6.3
WR	D. Moore	WR	LV	3.2
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	8.1
R/W/T	S. Rice	WR	SEA	0.0
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	9.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		0.0
BN	J. Flacco	QB	BAL	0.0
BN	R. Rice	RB	BAL	0.0
BN	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	3.7
BN	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	0.0
BN	D. Clark	TE	BAL	0.0
BN	N. Foles	QB	PHI	0.0

Cecil Your Shorts III (Foote) — 103.4 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	A. Dalton	QB	CIN	31.0
RB	M. Tolbert	RB	CAR	12.4
RB	G. Bernard	RB	CIN	2.7
WR	D. Thomas	WR	DEN	13.5
WR	D. Bowe	WR	KC	0.7
TE	C. Clay	TE	MIA	3.8
R/W/T	G. Tate	WR	SEA	21.3
K	M. Nugent	K	CIN	7.0
DEF	Saints	DEF		11.0
BN	M. Ryan	QB	ATL	9.3
BN	A. Foster	RB	HOU	0.0
BN	R. Mathews	RB	LAC	0.0
BN	J. Graham	TE	NO	15.7
BN	D. Davis	WR	ATL	13.7
BN	A. Jeffery	WR	CHI	0.0

Week 9: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 137.6 – 69.3 Asomugha to Mouth (W) vs Bronchtein

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 137.6 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	19.2
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	3.8
RB	L. Miller	RB	MIA	10.9
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	21.0
WR	D. Moore	WR	LV	8.2
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	12.6
R/W/T	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	40.9
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	13.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		8.0
BN	J. Flacco	QB	BAL	20.5
BN	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	3.9
BN	S. Rice	WR	SEA	0.0
BN	D. Clark	TE	BAL	1.4
BN	N. Foles	QB	PHI	45.6
BN	R. Hillman	RB	DEN	0.0

Asomugha to Mouth (Bronchtein) — 69.3 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	G. Smith	QB	NYJ	12.4
RB	B. Powell	RB	NYJ	2.9
RB	M. Lynch	RB	SEA	14.1
WR	G. Jennings	WR	MIN	5.6
WR	A. Brown	WR	PIT	13.1
TE	T. Gonzalez	TE	ATL	14.1
R/W/T	J.	K	erley	0.1
K	B. Walsh	K	MIN	4.0
DEF	Seahawks	DEF		3.0
BN	B. Tate	RB	HOU	7.9
BN	C.	K	aepernick	0.0
BN	F. Gore	RB	SF	0.0
BN	V. Cruz	WR	NYG	0.0
BN	C. Fleener	TE	IND	8.4
BN	J. Franklin	RB	GB	0.0

Week 10: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 83.0 – 100.2 Hauschka's Missed Tackles (L) vs Becker-Parton

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 83.0 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	31.7
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	5.6
RB	L. Miller	RB	MIA	1.1
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	14.0
WR	D. Moore	WR	LV	4.5
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	1.4
R/W/T	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	15.7
K	R. Gould	K	CHI	7.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		2.0
BN	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	5.7
BN	D. Clark	TE	BAL	6.1
BN	N. Foles	QB	PHI	22.9
BN	T. Richardson	RB	IND	3.5
BN	R. Hillman	RB	DEN	0.0
BN	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	0.0

Hauschka's Missed Tackles (Becker-Parton) — 100.2 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	R. Wilson	QB	SEA	21.5
RB	K. Moreno	RB	DEN	11.4
RB	L. Bell	RB	PIT	15.6
WR	D. Bryant	WR	DAL	4.4
WR	R. Randle	WR	NYG	11.0
TE	J. Reed	TE	WAS	12.2
R/W/T	M. James	RB	TB	4.1
K	N. Novak	K	LAC	8.0
DEF	Ravens	DEF		12.0
BN	D. Amendola	WR	NE	0.0
BN	J. Bell	RB	DET	4.1
BN	L. Blount	RB	NE	0.0
BN	R. Gronkowski	TE	NE	0.0
BN	R. Helu	RB	WAS	3.1
BN	J. Gordon	WR	CLE	0.0

Week 11: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 98.7 – 110.4 Cunt Punters (L) vs Wright

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 98.7 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	14.1
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	20.8
RB	L. Miller	RB	MIA	3.7
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	8.2
WR	D. Moore	WR	LV	7.1
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	11.2
R/W/T	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	11.6
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	8.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		14.0
BN	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	6.5
BN	D. Clark	TE	BAL	3.1
BN	N. Foles	QB	PHI	22.6
BN	T. Richardson	RB	IND	5.3
BN	R. Hillman	RB	DEN	0.0
BN	R. Gould	K	CHI	11.0

Cunt Punters (Wright) — 110.4 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	C. Palmer	QB	ARI	24.5
RB	C. Ivory	RB	NYJ	15.8
RB	E. Lacy	RB	GB	10.8
WR	J. Nelson	WR	GB	11.7
WR	B. Marshall	WR	CHI	4.2
TE	J. Cameron	TE	CLE	2.9
R/W/T	V. Jackson	WR	TB	22.5
K	G. Hartley	K		11.0
DEF	Panthers	DEF		7.0
BN	C. Ogbonnaya	RB	CLE	7.9
BN	S. Vereen	RB	NE	7.2
BN	A. Rodgers	QB	GB	0.0
BN	M. Tolbert	RB	CAR	1.7
BN	M. Floyd	WR	ARI	25.3
BN	Z. Stacy	RB	LAR	0.0

Week 12: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 52.6 – 103.3 The Arian Brotherhood (L) vs Valenzuela

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 52.6 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	18.5
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	2.7
RB	T. Richardson	RB	IND	2.6
WR	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	7.8
WR	D. Moore	WR	LV	0.0
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	9.4
R/W/T	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	3.6
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	10.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		-2.0
BN	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	0.0
BN	D. Clark	TE	BAL	2.4
BN	N. Foles	QB	PHI	0.0
BN	L. Miller	RB	MIA	4.7
BN	R. Hillman	RB	DEN	0.0
BN	R. Gould	K	CHI	3.0

The Arian Brotherhood (Valenzuela) — 103.3 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	M. Stafford	QB	DET	16.5
RB	J. Charles	RB	KC	27.7
RB	B. Rainey	RB	TB	3.5
WR	W. Welker	WR	DEN	3.1
WR	K. Allen	WR	LAC	12.4
TE	A. Gates	TE	LAC	2.1
R/W/T	D. Woodhead	RB	LAC	19.0
K	D. Bailey	K	DAL	6.0
DEF	Cardinals	DEF		13.0
BN	B. Green-Ellis	RB	CIN	0.0
BN	L. McCoy	RB	PHI	0.0
BN	A. Green	WR	CIN	0.0
BN	R. White	WR	ATL	2.4
BN	Titans	DEF		5.0
BN	Patriots	DEF		10.0

Week 13: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 87.2 – 102.6 Stanley's Cleveland Steamers (L) vs Waxman

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 87.2 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	7.8
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	7.0
RB	L. Miller	RB	MIA	8.5
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	3.6
WR	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	18.7
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	8.5
R/W/T	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	12.1
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	14.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		7.0
BN	B. Green-Ellis	RB	CIN	13.5
BN	D. Moore	WR	LV	0.0
BN	N. Foles	QB	PHI	23.7
BN	T. Richardson	RB	IND	1.9
BN	K. Thompkins	WR	NE	1.6
BN	R. Gould	K	CHI	8.0

Stanley's Cleveland Steamers (Waxman) — 102.6 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	T. Romo	QB	DAL	12.9
RB	C. Spiller	RB	BUF	21.7
RB	S. Jackson	RB	ATL	20.4
WR	L. Fitzgerald	WR	ARI	13.2
WR	T. Hilton	WR	IND	4.6
TE	D. Walker	TE	TEN	0.5
R/W/T	T. Smith	WR	BAL	15.3
K	P. Dawson	K	SF	11.0
DEF	Browns	DEF		3.0
BN	J. Thomas	TE	DEN	0.0
BN	J. Rodgers	RB	ATL	2.3
BN	A. Smith	QB	KC	22.3
BN	D. Sproles	RB	NO	4.3
BN	T. Williams	WR	DAL	0.3
BN	A. Ellington	RB	ARI	0.0

Week 14: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 107.9 – 86.1 Nicaraguan Crabtree Sandwich (W) vs Banys PLAYOFF

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 107.9 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	D. Brees	QB	NO	28.8
RB	B. Green-Ellis	RB	CIN	16.8
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	10.9
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	10.9
WR	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	11.1
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	4.0
R/W/T	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	15.4
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	9.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		1.0
BN	D. Moore	WR	LV	0.0
BN	N. Foles	QB	PHI	19.5
BN	T. Richardson	RB	IND	8.8
BN	L. Miller	RB	MIA	3.3
BN	K. Thompkins	WR	NE	0.0
BN	R. Gould	K	CHI	13.0

Nicaraguan Crabtree Sandwich (Banys) — 86.1 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	C. Newton	QB	CAR	15.2
RB	M. Forte	RB	CHI	23.5
RB	R. Mendenhall	RB	ARI	10.1
WR	M. Manningham	WR	SF	0.0
WR	P. Garcon	WR	WAS	3.7
TE	M. Bennett	TE	CHI	4.3
R/W/T	A. Boldin	WR	SF	9.3
K	N. Folk	K	NYJ	15.0
DEF	49ers	DEF		5.0
BN	D. McFadden	RB	LV	0.0
BN	R. Cooper	WR	PHI	9.4
BN	F. Jackson	RB	BUF	3.8
BN	M. Wallace	WR	MIA	1.9
BN	A. Dobson	WR	NE	0.0
BN	S. Hauschka	K	SEA	5.0
RES	M. Crabtree	WR	SF	4.0

Week 15: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 102.1 – 79.7 Asomugha to Mouth (W) vs Bronchtein PLAYOFF

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 102.1 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	N. Foles	QB	PHI	33.2
RB	B. Green-Ellis	RB	CIN	0.4
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	6.4
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	25.5
WR	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	7.0
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	8.8
R/W/T	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	1.8
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	8.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		11.0
BN	D. Moore	WR	LV	4.6
BN	D. Brees	QB	NO	20.5
BN	T. Richardson	RB	IND	16.2
BN	L. Miller	RB	MIA	6.1
BN	K. Thompkins	WR	NE	0.0
BN	R. Gould	K	CHI	8.0

Asomugha to Mouth (Bronchtein) — 79.7 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	C.	K	aepernick	20.3
RB	M. Lynch	RB	SEA	18.0
RB	F. Gore	RB	SF	8.6
WR	V. Cruz	WR	NYG	2.5
WR	A. Brown	WR	PIT	12.7
TE	C. Fleener	TE	IND	0.0
R/W/T	B. Powell	RB	NYJ	5.6
K	B. Walsh	K	MIN	12.0
DEF	--empty--	DEF		0.0
BN	J. Edelman	WR	NE	19.9
BN	B. Tate	RB	HOU	9.2
BN	A. Holmes	WR	LV	11.8
BN	G. Jennings	WR	MIN	22.3
BN	T. Gonzalez	TE	ATL	12.2
BN	J. McCown	QB	CHI	0.0
BN	Seahawks	DEF		24.0

Week 16: Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures 64.8 – 85.0 Stanley's Cleveland Steamers (L) vs Waxman PLAYOFF

Chip Kelly's Anal Fissures (Wood) — 64.8 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	N. Foles	QB	PHI	18.9
RB	B. Green-Ellis	RB	CIN	9.4
RB	R. Rice	RB	BAL	6.3
WR	D. Jackson	WR	PHI	4.1
WR	B. Hartline	WR	MIA	5.3
TE	G. Olsen	TE	CAR	3.5
R/W/T	A. Johnson	WR	HOU	6.3
K	S. Gostkowski	K	NE	11.0
DEF	Bears	DEF		0.0
BN	D. Moore	WR	LV	1.7
BN	D. Brees	QB	NO	12.1
BN	T. Richardson	RB	IND	5.8
BN	L. Miller	RB	MIA	0.8
BN	K. Thompkins	WR	NE	0.0
BN	R. Gould	K	CHI	5.0

Stanley's Cleveland Steamers (Waxman) — 85.0 pts

Slot	Player	Pos	NFL Team	Pts
QB	T. Romo	QB	DAL	14.9
RB	C. Spiller	RB	BUF	10.3
RB	J. Todman	RB	JAX	1.1
WR	T. Smith	WR	BAL	6.9
WR	L. Fitzgerald	WR	ARI	1.8
TE	J. Thomas	TE	DEN	13.8
R/W/T	T. Hilton	WR	IND	5.2
K	P. Dawson	K	SF	10.0
DEF	Bills	DEF		21.0
BN	J. Cook	TE	LAR	2.7
BN	D. Walker	TE	TEN	3.5
BN	S. Jackson	RB	ATL	10.9
BN	A. Smith	QB	KC	4.8
BN	D. Sproles	RB	NO	2.0
BN	A. Ellington	RB	ARI	7.2